WTF is wrong with people (part 2)

(Part 1 here)

I know,I know its been a little while since my last post. I have been busy, with this that and the other...Namely getting screwed, but that's another story. I may get into it a bit. We all know I love to make fun of all the fucking idiots out there. The problem is, is that I have too many fucknut story's at the moment...Where to start.

I'm going to start with my wife's favorite thing to complain about. And complain she does...non...stop...
Fucking idiot drivers. When did signals become optional on cars? What you can't use a fucking signal to let me know that your going to cut me off. It's not like its a hard thing to do. The fucking switch is 1.5" from your fucking finger. It must be that it takes too much brain power to figure out if it needs to go up or down. Fucking Fucknuts Use Your Fucking Signals!!!!!

On the flip side of that, turn you fucking signals OFF after changing lanes. How many of you have sat behind a car/truck wondering if the fucking moron is going to change lanes? All of you! What you can't remember 10 fucking seconds ago when you turned it on? Turn That Shit Off!!!

For those of you with road rage, know what the fuck you are getting into before you start going all crazy. May save you the embarrassment of looking like a total jackass.
One day a few years ago Nemeses and I were going to work. Some fucknut was doing like 50km over the limit, coming up right behind us out of no where. Passed us on the right and the cut us off, right in front of a red light. Nemeses had to stand on the breaks to avoid hitting the fucking asshole. So Nemeses flipped him the "bird" right behind him at the light making sure he saw. So as soon as this fucking moron saw this he thought he would be the big man and get out of his car to come beat the shit out of nemesis....Fucking dumdass. This fucking retard was about 5'10" medium build. Nemeses is 6'5' 250lbs, and intimidating...if you don't know him....Fucking teddy bear. So this guy gets out of his car and comes stomping up to our car. I start laughing knowing how this is going to turn out. Half way to our car Nemeses gets out of his car....At this point, in one fluid motion fucktard turns and heads back to his car...

OOOoooo, big man turned back by the gentile giant. Fucking retard. What if that was a woman? Would he have done the same thing? Maybe some young kid? Like WTF is wrong with people. He cut us off, almost made us smash into the back of him and when we get pissed he "try's" to retaliate. Fucking Moron.

Now, lets talk about plow trucks. It's getting into that time of year when the snow start to fly, and all these hard workers are out there day and night making sure you can get to work or home or the bar, whatever the case may be. You all need to know one thing about these guys. STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM THEM! I plow. I am no longer plowing in a truck, I plow in a front end loader (people stay away from me as they are afraid out it) But too often I see people not treating the trucks with the respect they deserve.

Do you not see that giant battering ram...I mean plow on the front of them?

I once got pulled over by the cops for "running a red light" Fucking bullshit, but anyway, I told him it was yellow and that i did not think I could stop safely. Fucking cop says," You have a four wheel vehicle." Yes!, it does have four wheels! Fuck off I know what he meant. Yes, it does have four wheel drive. It also has the same amount of breaks as any other vehicle. Yes, I have better traction WHILE driving. Stopping is the same as any other vehicle though. Even worse though as I have a giant battering ram...fuck I mean plow on the front of my truck.

Just so things are clear for you all. In Canada, a blue light on a truck means, STAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY! If you hit me, its your fault. If I hit you...ITS YOUR FAULT. Fucking retards. Why do you have to be so fucking retarded?

Tips to live by.

1. Don't pass a plow/salt truck on the road. That's just asking to get killed.

2. Don't cut off a plow/salt truck. That's just asking to get killed.

3. If you see two plow/salt trucks, don't squeeze in between them. (You know who you are.)

4. I you hit or are hit by a plow truck, its your fault. Don't argue, don't point fingers. Accept it. Your a D.U.M.ass

5. If someone flips you the "bird", accept that YOU did something wrong. Don't be a jackass and try to be the "big man", as stated above, you could end up looking like a douche, and your just being a fucking jackass.

6. If you are stuck in a ditch, $50 bucks gets you out. No money, your shit out of luck.


I could keep going with this, but it wont sink in. You will all continue to be fucking idiot drivers.

It's ??:?? O'clock Do you kow where your kids are.

I wanna talk about kids. You know those little cute bundles of puke, shit, slobber...oh, and Joy.

People if you have kids, WATCH THEM. They are getting in trouble. I'm not talking about teens or even preteens, although you should keep an eye on them too (the little fuckers) But I mean the younger ones. Too often these days I see way to many unwatched kids wreaking havoc out there in our streets.

Let me ask you this. Should a 5 year old child be playing in the middle of a road unwatched? NO?! How dare you say, NO. What kind of parent are you? Oohhh, a good one!
That's right, the road is no place for a kid. Fuck, Its not safe for an adult these days. Especially Smokers. OK, Well how about letting your 3 year old be taken to the store that is half a click away, by their 5 year old brother. NO, Are you kidding me? That's wrong you say? Why, that 5 year old will know what to do in case a bad situation happens. He's a responsible little guy. He can almost wipe his own ass. He knows how to use a toaster! Unfortunately, he hasn't mastered the round peg square hole thing yet.

All too often I see this...well actually I see it almost everyday. There are a lot of kids that play on our road, and our road is quite busy. People speed through it constantly. We had to have speed bumps installed because of this. Not that it made a difference. Yet, Parents (Crackhead lady) still lets their children play unsupervised where all these cars are speeding by.

We have a lady (I use this term loosely)....Let's call her, Ummmm...aaahhww... Crackhead lady! She has two young children, both under six. Both are never watched. EVER. I have almost run both of these kids over multiple times. I can honestly say that I don't go flying through our complex. I take my time, as there are so many kids running around. But, even so these kids just run out into the road without looking. All the time. Uh, WTF happened too, "Your to young to cross the road". Come on anyone my age has told the story about trying to run away from home. You know the one. You got to the end of the street and couldn't cross the road, so had to turn back and go back home. Shit like that doesn't happen anymore. Fucking kids end up at the airport.

Yes, I had a neighbours kid end up there it has happened. Yet another fine example of good parenting.

Where are all the good parents? What happened to all of our good children? Is it the music they listen to? No, That's bullshit. Any parent that blames music is using it as a scapegoat. I listened to Iron Maiden, Black Sabbath, Manson...etc... You don't see me running around killing people. Well not yet anyway.....Joking...or am I?

There is another kid on our street. You just have to look at this kid to know he is bad news. He looks like trouble. Fucking kid thought it would be funny to scream into my car window as I was driving by him. He stood as close as he could so when he screamed I thought I had run over his foot or something. "Holy shit!" Is this kid alright? I hope I didn't hurt him....Fucking kid was so close to dieing when I discovered that he was just being a fucking retard. Give me a fucking heart attack!
"What you think that was funny?" I asked him.
"NO" ....NO?, WTF. At least be fucking honest. What?, It's not funny anymore because I stopped and got out of my car? You can tell I'm about to kill you. Yeah, ...Not that fucking funny was it. "Then why did you do it?"
"I don't know.", saying this with a smile on his face....Can I kill him?....No...I can at least beat him black and blue right?
No?...OK, so what can I do?
I can tell his parents...Yeah....They seem to be doing a great job at raising him to begin with...But, none the less I truck on over to his parents house. I'll let them know what just happened.

"What do you want me to do about it?" they say.

Are you fucking kidding me? You have to be joking right. Yeah, that's a good joke..............You are kidding..........right? The blank stare I get is priceless. This is a woman who has no idea what her kid is up too, let alone cares....insert lots of cursing here.... Fucking retards need to stop breeding.

At this point I would like to say that my version of retard is; A fucking stupid ass motherfucker of a prick who has no fucking idea how to be a normal ass fucking person because he/she is too fucking stupid to fucking understand or comprehend anything. (actual challenged people excluded....insert gray area)

Or something like that...

Either way, I scared the shit out of this kid. I know that he wont be doing anything like that to me or my family again. For the next few weeks anyway.

When it comes down to it, WATCH YOUR FUCKING KIDS....



Testicles, that is all....

Anyone got a lighter?

I am a smoker. Yep, that's me. I'm one of those fucks that pollutes the air you breath... Fuck that shit! Stop whining you stupid D.U.M. fucks. My little tiny smoke is not destroying the environment. It is not killing you. But, because I smoke, I get fucking screwed at every turn.

I started smoking when I was 14 years old. Yeah its young and I DO regret it, but it happened. Trying to impress a girl and all that. When I started, a pack of smokes was $3. Whats the price of them now? $10+ WTF! is that. Lets keep raising the price of cigarettes because we all know that those evil smokers wont quit, this way we can make a ton of money off them...We can call it a "sin tax". Ummm, Extortion much. This is our government. The Mob.

Then they take smoking out of restaurants and bars, Unless you have a separate ventilated area. Cool, OK, you can close us away in a little box. Yep, a little small fucking box. Almost every Bar/Restaurant I went to had the tiny little box completely filled with people, with a lineup to get in. While the non-smoking area was....Ummm, where are all the non-smokers? I thought they wanted us out of there so they could enjoy themselves. NO, you fucking bitch whine and complain to get what you want. You don't even know what the fuck you want.

Then to top that off. They take away our little tiny boxes.Yeah that's right, they took them away, just as we were starting to like them! Why?, You ask. Because the waiter/waitress has got to go in there. OK, fine. Fucking whiny ass bitches.

Ok, so now we all have to step outside the door, go outside to have a smoke....Fine I will freeze my ass off, get wet in the rain, whatever I have to do. Just to be understanding. I will be the bigger man and not complain .I wouldn't want anyone to go out of there way for me at all.

"I'm sorry, what was that? I have to stand 10m away from the door to have my smoke?" OK, WTF, So I can't smoke inside or in a little tiny box or outside....Umm, where the fuck can I go?

Now, smoking is a bad thing. It is. It will cause cancer...or so they tell us.

The exhaust from cars cause cancer as well. Much more quickly I might add. Tell you what, I can sit in my car with the windows up, chain smoke an entire pack of smokes and MAYBE feel a little light headed...Now lets route the exhaust of your car into the cab. I give you about 5 Min's before you are dead. Yep that's right D E A D. My cigarette pumps out carbon dioxide/monoxide just like a car does. Only the car does it 10,000 times faster.

Almost everyone has a car...How many smokers are there?

I don't see people complaining about any cars in front of said restaurant. Oh, that's right the cars are outside....Wait, WTF so am I! Why the fuck am I so fucking evil? I'll put money down on the fact that the same people that complain about all us evil smokers own 2+ vehicles. A giant gas guzzling, exhaust spewing SUV. But, my tiny little smoke is killing everyone.

Ever sat back and wondered if people died of all these cancers say 100 years ago, 200 years ago? Sure they did. Not in the numbers people do today. Back then cancer was an uncommon thing. Today people are dropping like flies. It must be the smokes. Wait a minute though, people have been smoking for more then 200 years. Fuck they been lighting up those pipes for at least 3-4000 years. No it must be these filters they have on cigarettes now. Those evil fucking filters!

Could it be the cars? As more cars are put on the road, cancer rates have risen as well. There are less smokers today then there were 20 years ago, but cancer is still on the rise. Oh yeah, fuck silly me, its all that second hand...oh yeah that's right, the only place I can smoke is under my covers, in bed, at home, at 3am. Any other time I may offend someone.

Oh, what was that? Their talking about banning smoking in apartment buildings. So now we can't smoke in our own homes....

I'm not offended. I don't mind being segregated. Labeled a bad person because I like to enjoy my life to the fullest.

"Smoking shortens your life!" So do car accidents, falling bricks, the hamster flu, lightning, choking, drowning and calling your wife fat. Just to name a few.

These same people that complain, I'll bet drink. Well drinking lead to liver disease, drunk driving, waking up next to ugly people, premature aging and social disparity. I say we rally together and kick these bastards out of our bars. They are killing people with their drunk driving, namely us smokers, as we are the one out on the sidewalks and the roads. Targets to be run over!

Run hide!

Turn down your fucking music

OK, let's see. I've talked about D.U.M. people (always a favorite subject of mine), Stupid people (yes, there is a difference), my new cat....What else.....Hummmm.....I got it!


Respect

There are way too many fuckers out there that just have no respect at all. I'm talking about the real fucking asshats. Take for instance my neighbors. I live in a townhouse condo. Each house is a big square and each home is a corner of said square. So I share a wall with two of my neighbors. My one neighbor is fantastic. She is a single black mother with 2 kids. Fantastic woman. Very rarely do we hear any sound from them. Never bothersome. Now the fucker that lives behind me is an asshat from hell. Real fucking fucktard. We share our living room wall as well as our master bedroom wall. Now this fucker seems to think that his living room is a Reggie concert hall. It wouldn't be a problem if it was once in a while. Once or twice a month....once or twice a week.....Noooo, This fucker has to play it almost everyday/night! Now anyone who knows Reggie knows that it is full of bass. Lot and lots of bass, and this guy has a good system. Hey, you got a good system crank it, by all means, But for fuck sakes not every day! Not a 6am, WHAT THE FUCK! (yeah, I had to spell out that one!) Come on, what you have no fucking T.V., No fucking head phones. This guys music is so fucking loud, When I'm wearing MY headphones listing to MY music (and I have it at ear bleeding levels) I can hear this Fucknuts music.

Go over say something to this disrespectful idiot, you say? Been there done that. We've called the Cops....Gets turned down 3-6 hours later when the cops finally get there. Not blaming the police at all. I know they have better things to do, *cough*donuts*cough*. They tell me that I have let my condo corp know. So I E-mailed my condo rep. He told me they would send a letter telling him to keep it down.

He did keep it down for about a month, then it slowly started to get louder and louder. What did he think, that we wouldn't notice? Is this guy fucking retarded?

Ever hear of the boiled frog experiment? If you put a frog in boiling water it tries to get out, I sure it dies though! Yeah I know its mean. BUT, if you put the frog in cold water and slowly boil it the frog never moves. It slowly boils to death.

Frog legs anyone?

I am not a frog.

Off goes the 4th, yes 4th letter to our condo people. What do they tell us this time. They will send a letter, BUT, we should get in contact with the police...WTF, last I checked, "NO, loud music, sounds etc.," were in our condo rules. So let me get this straight. I pay almost $200 a month for you to tell me to call the cops.

I don't think there are expletives for me to vent my anger with at this moment


OK, Your telling me that you can't do anything? Fuck that, Fuck you and Fuck this shit. I know you can do something. At the very start of summer my wife and I were doing some much needed spring cleaning. After finding what looked like a failed science experiment in the back of our fridge, we put that particular garbage bag outside our front door. We have a big community garbage bin a few houses down from us. When we were ready to take out all the garbage, it had started to pour. So we decided to wait until the next day to take the 3-4 bags we had. So when I got up the next morning at 6am for work I decided I would be nice to my wife and take it all out myself before I left for work, yeah yeah, I know, I'm a good husband. When taking it out I see we have a letter stuck to our door. It's from our condo corp. It read, "This is your first garbage infraction, your next infraction you will be fined $75." OK, Don't get mad....I am in control of the situation....Count to ten.....alright I understand we all want to keep our community looking good. It was a mistake, but I.....under....stand.... So, you can fine me $75 for a garbage bag left outside my front door for less the 8 hours, but you can't do anything to the guy who breaks the rules on a daily basis....Fucked? I think so. At this point I would like to point out that our neighbors. who live directly across from us, there front door faces our front door and is about 12' away, always have a ton of shit in front in front of their house. Garbage bags, cardboard boxes, candy wrappers, newspapers...etc. We have sent in complaints to our condo corp about this, and what has been done about it I ask? Jack Fucking Squat! That's what. So I can get fined but they can't, Ummm, Why the fuck is that? Did I miss a memo or something.

"If you care about how the outside of you home looks, and have respect for the fact that your neighbors don't want to be listing to your music, you have to follow our rules. BUT, If you don't give a shit about how your home and your neighbors home looks and couldn't give a flying fuck that you share a wall with someone who has small children. You can blast your music and throw your garbage around with no consequence."

This is the impression I get. Wouldn't you?

To make things even better, this fucknut asked me this summer if he could borrow my weed eater.....Ummmm, Fuck you..... Tell you what, I'll give him my weed eater.....Maybe not in the way he thinks though.

The evils of shopping

So it's my one and only day off this week and I woke up early. Yeah that's right no sleeping in for me. 7:30am my eye's opened and would not close again. But, no big deal. I will survive.

So I crawled/fell out of bed with the intentions of doing nothing today. I almost succeeded. Minus having to make coffee...twice, I had to do some grocery shopping. Now, unlike most guys I know I like shopping for food. You wouldn't think so by looking at me as I'm a skinny little fuck, But I love my food. I also love to cook. So walking around in a grocery store to me is like a wonderland of discovery.

BUT, I Fucking hate other shoppers. People are just Fucking retarded in these cornucopia's of foodly goodness.

Why would you park your cart at the very end of an isle, sideways so no one can pass. On top of that let's leave our 1y/o child in the cart and walk away to another isle. Now lets say I did this hypothetically. If I came back and saw someone who dresses like me moving off with MY cart with MY child in it, I would fucking freak out. What the fuck is this weird ass guy doing with my child!?

This is the situation I came up against today. WFT, who the hell leaves a small child unattended, blocking the end of an isle? After some looking around I finally find the owner of this kid.

"You wanna move your cart?" I ask.

"Give me a min, I'm busy." he replies, not even looking at me...Excuse me....Your busy? Fuck you you little fucking fuck of a fuck. OK..., Breath..., I tell myself. You have your daughter with you. Set a good example. You are in control of the situation.

"Well your cart is blocking the isle, can you please move it."

Once again without looking at me, he replies,"I said, I'm busy." none to nicely either.

OK, wrong fucking answer fucktard. I'm not exactly a big guy or anything far from it. I'm 6'1" about 140-150lbs. But the way I dress I can be intimidating. I am a metal head. Big boots, Band shit, etc. This guy is maybe 5'4" 100lbs soaking wet with a brick in his pocket. Looking back to see what my daughter is doing, I see she is grabbing a few boxes of Kraft Dinner. Perfect!

Leaning forward, I calmly say,"If you don't move your cart, your face is going to become a part of it." He finally turns to face me, with a scowl on his face. First looking at my chest, his eye's move slowly up to my face. I could tell he was about to say something, probably something along the lines of, "Fuck you" but he smartly kept his mouth shut. Suffice to say he moved his cart.

Now I do have to admit, that this very rarely happens to me. My best friend gets to do this kinda stuff all the time. The guy is huge. Not the type of person you fuck with at all. But for me, I have to pick and chose my battles. Oh, the glory. Fucking fucktard. That's right move your shit! Bitch!

All this and my daughter saw nothing. Fantastic!

So moving on,as my little girl and I are walking through the store we can hear a couple have a pretty good argument. Everyone in the store could here these people for a good ten min's. We were grabbing some pop, when the couple comes up behind us. They are having an argument about money. Not the best place to argue but hey, in the heat of the moment, one place is as good as another. My problem was the language spilling from this guys mouth. My virgin ears! OK....So I swear with the best of them, but not in front of children. The odd cruse pops out, sorry, but as a whole, I have respect for the fact that this is the type of language our kids should not know. Until they learn it at the playground.

I turn to the guy and say,"Hey, you mind watching your language, There are kids around." Pointing to my daughter.

"Fuck you and your daughter!" He says. Oh...No...You...DIDN'T!! You wanna say shit like that to me, Fine. But never, ever,FUCKING EVER, say that shit to my daughter! As he is say this to me, The manager of the store is walking up to him. Before I can retaliate the manager is asking him to leave. His attention is then taken away from me and he starts to argue with him.Fuck! Oh what I wouldn't have given to say my piece to this fucknut. WTF is wrong with people. Come on, saying that shit to a kid! This guy needs a good fucking ass whooping. I would have given my left nut to be the one who did it.

Finally, I've gotten everything on my list. Time to get the fuck out of this hell hole. I find the shortest line. Yeah shortest line...that's right I get the line that not only does the cashier have to call for a price check, but the 1000 year old woman paying for it all has to pay in pennies...OK you ant to pay in change, Cool, I understand. But do me one favor. If you know you will be paying with a bunch of change.

HAVE THAT FUCKING CHANGE READY!!!!

Holy fuck, What the fuck is wrong with you. You know what every grocery store need is a Senior citizens line. Call it the "Slow ass old people with nothing but pennies line"

God, people are fucked! Next time I got shopping, My daughter stays at home. Give me a little bit more leeway....

WTF is wrong with people

I gonna start this one off by saying that People these days have no Respect. Not a shred. No one says thank you anymore. People don't hold open a door for anyone. If I'm driving in heavy traffic and someone needs over into my lane but there is no space, I'll slow down a bit to give said person room to come over. What do I get in return. Fuck All. What you can't give a simple wave to say, "Hey, thanks for letting me in." Noooooo, that's to much to do. Lazy ass fuck. But I'll tell you this, if the roles were reversed, but I forced my way in front of the other car, I'm sure he wouldn't mind waving a finger. So you can wave a finger that is attached to your hand to say fuck you, but to wave a thanks is just to fucking much to ask.

If I hold open a door for you say thank you. Common Courtesy. Not that fucking Common.

My daughter is in Sparks (first level of girl guides) They are supposed to teach kids how to be polite. My wife who is 8.5 months pregnant was dropping her off one night 2 weeks ago. All the leaders were bringing in boxes of girl guide cookies so my wife politely held open the door for them. Now these are not small doors. It is a church that these meetings are held, so they are the big heavy wooden doors. Out of the 4-5 people bringing in these boxes only 1 person said thank you. One! What the FUCK! Way to show these kids. Way to set a good fucking example. That was no easy task for my wife. Trying to hold my 5 y/o daughter out of the way, hold open a door for like five min's, to not even be acknowledged is detestable. What the FUCK! I told her she should have said something. But do you even think that would have done anything. NO....no it wouldn't. If a person can't acknowledge that someone (who is pregnant no less) held a door for them to make their small pathatic little lives a little easier, Then they just don't give a flying fuck. Oh, they'll say sorry, but they wont learn anything from it. And "Sorry" doesen't cover it.

Sorry, I forgot to do the dishes....
Sorry, I ment to pick that up.....
Sorry, I forgot to say thank you....
Sorry, I'm a compleat asshat that has no respect for anyone or anything and can't show a little gratatude when it's do.

The word sorry has lost its meaning. As my grandmother used to say, "Sorry covers a multiude of sins." Meaning that it is used so much it means almost nothing.

I have the best "Sorry" story ever. I drive a big Ford F350 truck with a 30 foot trailer that is all painted Swiss Aqua (blue/green, ugly I know) Very eye catching hard to miss.
I'm driving up to a red light in the left hand turn lane. Now this is an intersection that has 3 lanes each side with a big concrete barrier in between. Each direction has a right/straight lane, a stright lane, a BIG ASS crosshatched space, then a left hand turn lane, BIG ASS concrete barrier. As i said I am comming up to a red light in the left hand turn lane. Next thing I know there is a stupid ass fuck making a left in my lane. I slam on the breaks and avoid hitting this guy by mear inches. What does this stupid ass FUCK do? Throws up his hands looks at me and asks WTF I'm doing. WTF I'm DOING! You have got to be kidding me. Where the fuck did this stupid ass fuck of a fuck learn to fucking drive. This guy is pissed that I'm in his way. So I yell out my window that he's in the wrong fucking lane. He looks around, took him a few seconds to catch on, but soon realizes his mistake. Oh but wait it gets better. Then the Fucking moron decides to try and drive through on comming traffic to get around the barrier. Like HOLY Shit this guy is gonna kill someone. My favorite part of this whole ordeal is the fact that he couldn't even bother to say he's sorry. Not even a wave. No, he just looked at us all like it was our fault that he's an idiot.

Stupid people need to be shot......